I was killed before I was born! (Women in India)

I took birth inside my mother’s womb. I love my parents so much, though they don’t know about me, yet. My mother took the test and found she was pregnant. She was so happy, I could feel it inside here. She informed my father and they both were so happy. They went to the doctor and discovered I was a girl. Their smiles vanished! What happened?? What have I done?? Is it my mistake that I am a girl?? They are in a serious conversation with the doctor. I see my father paying the doctor. No! They are planning to kill me. No, mother, father, please… Please don’t kill me. I am your little daughter. Your symbol of Love. ………… (They killed her. Why did they kill her? Whose mistake was it? The parent’s? Or the society? Or the people?)

What would have happened if she was born? : She started going to school when she turned 3. Her parents never really bothered where she was until she got her first periods. She told about the situation to her mother. She was worried. In India, once a girl comes of her age, she is supposed to stay at home, confined in one place for 5 to 6 days, have a separate plate, glass, pillow, bed sheets. (Yes! This is still followed in some places in India) After this, she was asked to be very careful when she went out. Staying away late was not allowed. She was asked to wear clothes that would “COVER” her body. She was still teased and whistled at by the guys on road. During the nights, she wondered “Why am I not supposed to wear short dresses? Why am I asked to be careful? Why does no one warn the men to behave well? Why are men allowed to roam around at night and not me?” and many more.

Her father dropped her to school/college and picked her up everyday. “You want to go to your friend’s place? Come I will drop you” he would say. She felt chained. It felt like something was holding her back. She could not express how she felt. After college was over, her parents started looking for a guy to marry her off. But she told them she wanted to work and build her career, follow her dreams, accomplish her goal.

But no. She was asked to do household chores and learn to cook as it was more important according to them. She used to wake up early, clean the house, cook food, wash clothes and repeat it again everyday. If something was not done properly, she would get beaten by her father.

Then she was married to this man who was almost twice her age. Why? Because, he demanded less dowry. Her parents took it as the best opportunity and sent her away. Once she got married, she had a lot of responsibilities as a wife, as a daughter-in-law, sister-in-law… She was beaten everyday by her old husband, her mother-in-law abused her for not doing her work perfectly, her brother-in–law molested her and threatened her. After all this she would still be quiet. Why? Because if she said anything, people will start talking things about her family and her family’s reputation would be at stake. What would happen if something like this happened? People would stop talking to any member of her family and they would not help them when in need.

She then became pregnant, for the first time in her life she felt happy. She had hope. She thought to herself that she would not let her child face whatever she had faced in her life. Her husband took her to the doctor. They discovered the child was a female. The mother was so happy but scared at the same time. Her husband was planning for an abortion and forcefully the child in her womb was killed.

***********************************************

The child that was killed would have gone through all this if she was born. So, was it better to kill the girl? I do not know the answer. Think for yourself.

I agree that nowadays, all of this doesn’t happen to a single girl but it does happen with every girl in India at some point of time in her life. If a girl is raped, she is the one who is blamed for wearing a short dress and no one even knows the man’s name and is not even bothered to find it out. A girl can never walk on a crowded street wearing a short dress or even for that matter say wearing a sleeveless top without being touched at the wrong places by men who pretend to be rushing.

Comparing the old times, we women have come a long way but we still have a longer way to go, before all of this is erased from India. Or can it even be erased?? I leave you here to ponder on this. Do let us know what you think by commenting.

Till then eat healthy, be happy, keep rockin

Muuaahh,

Pooja

Desperation!

We all go through this period of time, where no matter how satisfied we are at work, we have this desperation to take some time off from work and live our life without any stress. The desperation to take the corporate tag around our neck, toss it in the trash and just walk out of office. The desperation to take a long sabbatical and not be judged for it.

The desperation to just delete Facebook, Twitter, Instagram accounts and not keep scrolling pages at night, looking at others’ living a “happy life” and sighing. The desperation to throw the mobile phone into a river saying “Screw you, Candy crush enabling piece of shit!!!” and live a carefree life without having to inform people about your whereabouts.

The desperation to eat that piece of Toblerone which you have been avoiding for months just to be in shape. Guess what? It doesn’t matter. Eat that and enjoy every bite of it.

The desperation to follow your dreams and do whatever the hell you want. Go become a teacher, a zoo-keeper or a cook if you want to. Take that box of crayons that has been just lying in your drawer since a long time and start doodling a big ass masterpiece on the chart paper.

Go buy a box of clay and start molding it to whatever you feel like and make your friends clap for it because it will make you happy 🙂

The desperation to travel the world, meet new people, make new friends, know different cultures, go to a secluded place and sit alone for hours, thinking about nothing but just a screensaver playing in your mind. Once you are there, let the breeze caress that “Ugly” face which T.V commercials promise to make “pimple-free and toned”. Let nature tell you, “You silly bastard, you are perfectly fine just the way you are. I made you this way.”

The desperation to go on an adventure more often than bragging about your silly “I phone” which you will eventually get bored of as soon as the next model is launched. Instead go bungee jump from the highest height possible and feel that adrenaline rush as you scream your lungs out and realize that this feeling will never match up with any other.

The desperation to get to know your family better. Know how your father spent his childhood, who was your mom’s first crush, what is your brother’s passion, your parents biggest achievements and disappointments. Thank your mom and hug her everyday. Yes, every freakin day.

The desperation to live your life the way you want to, for the precise reason that it’s your to live. Fill it with love, friends, travel and a little bit of pixie dust. Because that is all that matters.

What are you waiting for??? Stop staring at your screen and get the hell out!!!

As I always say, eat healthy, be happy and keep rockin.

Muuahh,

Pooja

How Bangalore changed my Life

I lived in Chennai before I shifted to Bangalore. As I stayed with my family, I didn’t get to roam around much or travel much. I then came to Bangalore in search of a job which I did get in a week — at Amazon. Yes, I am a proud Amazonian 🙂 

Once I shifted here in a PG, I struggled a lot as I have never stayed alone before. First struggle was to get adjusted to the food that was made in the PG (Yes, tell me about it). Then it was getting adjusted to new people around as I was never a person who would mingle easily. But I got adjusted or say I started talking to people and made new friends. But the struggle was a small part…

I started being independent — I learned to stay alone and manage. Met many awesome people at Amazon and had an awesome friends circle. Hangin out — sleepovers — gossips — work was fun 

And the first Salary of my Life!!! God!!! The feeling!!! Its just incomparable. Especially when you have worked hard, put your heart and soul into it and earned it. Adding to that was the feeling you get when you buy gifts for your loved ones with your first salary. Saree for mom, shirt for dad and lots of stuff for my sweet lil bro (skullcandy, shirt, t-shirts, accessories and the list will go on)

Well, this is basically my life. I work hard, make my family and friends happy, make me happy with a lil bit of shopping and having yummy delicacies (Yea, I am a foodie who doesn’t look like one :P), teach children in govt. schools, watch movies…

So, here is my first post. Yes, I have done it!! I used to think of topics to write about when I had thoughts about starting a blog but then never wrote one thinking I am not good enough. But I think its a pretty good start.. Lets see what more comes 🙂

Till then eat healthy, be happy, keep rockin

Muuaahh,

Pooja